Every once in awhile there is a sporting event that makes you go, "wow, holy cow, that
was unbelievable. If you're as old as me, you might've said that the night the U.S beat
the Soviets in hockey during the 1980 Winter Olympics. I was at Game 6 of the 1986
World Series when Bill Buckner did his thing as the Mets pulled off an amazing
comeback. Or it could've been a game like Super Bowl XXXXII where the Giants
upset the Patriots to ruin New England's perfect season that had you breathless.
Saturday/Sunday's epic final between Novak Djokovic and Rafeal Nadal earned, "Oh, my
god, are you kidding me" status. The match lasted 5 hours and 53 minutes, the longest
Grand Slam final in tennis history. Imagine running back and forth, side-to-side, stopping
and starting, serving and volleying for six hours? That was insane. Almost six hours of
tennis. It got me thinking to the things I could've done during the tennis match.
Half-Ironman triathlon. In September, I did an event that consisted of a 1.2 mile swim,
56 miles bike, and a 13.1 mile run. I'm considered a Clydesdale (slow, white guys over 200lbs)
and I finished in 6:02:15, which means I could've started just as the match opened and finished
just as Djokivic was hoisting the trophy in his sweat-stained attire.
Driven from New Canaan, CT to Washington D.C. When I used to drive from home to college
in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. I used to mark the nation's capital as my half-way point. Roughly
300 miles. I used to make it D.C, with traffic, tolls, and potty-breaks in 5 hours plus. With a stop
off for McDonald's for a Big Mac and Dairy Queen for a blizzard, it would come out to six hours.
NHL All-Star Game-Red Sox/Yankees (rewind)
I could've watched the NHL all-star game, booed Tim Thomas, then watched a replay of any
Yankees/Red Sox game (pick one, they always take about 4 hours to play.)
Watched "60 Minutes" six times in a row. Give me the best of Andy Rooney for that long and
I'd be happy guy.
Flown from New York's LaGuardia to Atlanta...and back. It would've given me the perfect
opportunity to fly to my old home in the ATL, check on my condo, say hello to the tenants,
fix their microwave oven and fly back home. And Nadal STILL would've been trying to beat
three hours. The Giants/49ers went just a bit longer, but I didn't need to see Lawrence Tynes'
chip shot field goal. It was a gimme. Ooops, that's what Ravens fans were saying about Billy
Read the transcripts of Tiger's text messages to all his women. I didn't see Tiger choke in
his first tournament because I was sleeping and it was somewhere in Abi Dhabi, something or
other. But I did find some piece of fine literature in the book store about all his text messages.
It said the average reading time would be 5:53 minutes. Right on the button!
Could've watched the re-run of the Kim Kardashian-Kris Humprhies made for television
wedding. That piece of garbage was four hours, so in reality, you could've watched that entire
show then checked out the "Bachelor" and "Bachelorette", had time to throw up, then seen
the ending to the greatest tennis match in history. There is a rumor that Kim texted Nadal
after the match and asked him on a date. He said, "nada".
Gone to church and confession. One hour praising the lord, then the rest of the time in
the sin bin asking for forgiveness. It's been a long time, I'd take a knee and grab a snickers.