Wednesday, November 26, 2014

TOP 1O TURKEYS OF 2014



1O.  JOSH SHAW  Give the USC defensive back some serious credit for having a fertile
        imagination. He sprained both ankles and told his coaches that he suffered them while
        jumping off a second-floor balcony to get to a pool where his nephew was drowning.
        What a hero! What a story! What a lie! When pressured to give details about the story
        the Trojans' captain cracked under pressure and admitted the whole thing was lie. Hero
        to zero in less than 24 hours.


  9.   JOSE CANSECO The steroid king is the king of drama and seemingly addicted to
        attention. While cleaning his gun one afternoon, it accidentally went off. (I'm totally shocked)
        and the bullet took off part of his finger. Doctors attached it but a few weeks later while
        playing poker, the finger fell off. Canseco  said he was going to sell it on eBay.
        That's Canseco being Canseco. Go away, please. Like now.
     

  8.   A-ROD seems to make this list every year. After sitting out all of 2013 because
        MLB suspended him for his involvement in the Biogenesis scandal, it was discovered
        that A-Rod gave his cousin, Yuri, a million dollars to keep his pie hole shut about the
        amount of cheat A-Rod pumped into his body. Then, after denying everything about
        his involvement with Tony Bosch and PED's, A-Rod told the Feds he used PED's
        he received from Bosch. He's just the kind of guy you want your daughter to bring
        home for Thanksgiving. Right.


  7.   JUSTIN BRENT Speaking of people you don't want to bring home for dinner. The
        Notre Dame receiver was proud as a peacock when he showed up with Lisa Ann on his
        arm to a New York Knicks game several weeks ago. That wasn't too bad, but
        when the legendary porn star snapped a selfie of them between the sheets, Touchdown
        Jesus and everybody else on the campus of Notre Dame weren't exactly celebrating
        the score. The Fighting Irish haven't won a game since.


 6.   TRENT DILFER After the Patriots got blown out by Kansas City on September 29,
        the ESPN analyst declared New England was toast, "The Patriots are just not any good
        anymore." Since that game, the Patriots are 7-0. Man, that is great analysis and should
        find it's rightful place on "SportsCenter's NOT top 10" feature.


   5.   RAY LEWIS After news broke that the Baltimore Ravens might have tried to
        cover-up the Ray Rice scandal, ESPN turned to Ray Lewis for expert commentary.
        The former Ravens linebacker uttered the words that made everybody, including the
        suits at ESPN just cringe.


                           Lewis seemed to forget that he was arrested for a double-murder in
                          Atlanta in 2000 and was accused by the police of trying to cover it up.

  4.   RYDER CUP USA TEAM After getting hammered by the Europeans in the Ryder
        Cup (again), the United States did what they do best: whine and point fingers. Phil
        Mickelson threw captain Tom Watson under the bus and said they didn't have little
        "pods" to play patty-cake in like they did in 2008 when Paul Azinger was the captain.
        Watson ended up taking the blame and the PGA set up a "task-force" to figure out
        why the team keeps losing. I don't know, it might have something to do with the
        players choking, but I'm not really sure. What an embarrassment.


  3.   PATRIOTS FANS AND BOSTON MEDIA.  It's one thing for Dilfer to bash
        the Patriots, it's quite another when the New England fan base and media slam
        the team like they did. After the loss to Kansas City, they were jumping ship as
        if the ebola virus was about to infect them. The media said Bill Belichick couldn't
        evaluate talent anymore and didn't provide Tom Brady with enough weapons to work
        with. Fans treated Brady as if he were the second coming of Geno Smith instead of the
        stone cold-lock first ballot Hall of Famer he is. The Patriots have gone 7-0 since then
        and everybody's trying to back on the ship with the same passion and fervor as the
        idiots going into stores on Black Friday.



  2.   DONALD STERLING The longtime owner of the Los Angeles Clippers became
        a former owner after the NBA bounced him after making racist comments to his
        then girlfriend V. Stiviano who secretly recorded the entire conversation. Now, that's
        a loyal girlfriend! Sterling was forced to sell the team which he did for $2 billion which
        is an insane amount for a franchise like the Clippers.



  1.   ROGER GOODELL You'd think a guy who gets paid a salary of $44 million could
        do something right, but the NFL commissioner has been flunking a lot of tests over the
        last 6 months. He made a mess of the Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson scandals and
        then after coming out to face the press after weeks in exile, Goodell pretty much said
        he'll have a new code of conduct policy and he'll tell you about it at the Super Bowl.
        See you in February, commish.


     
        



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