Monday, August 26, 2013


In honor of Martin Luther King Jr.'s brilliant "I have a dream" speech which turns 50 on
August 28,  I have put together a list of the things I often dream about.

I have a dream that I'll never have to read or hear Johnny Manziel, the NCAA, and illegal
anything in the same sentence for at least the next six months.

I have a dream that in my next life, I have a name as cool as Carlos Danger.

I have a dream that Major League Baseball will make it for a least a year without being
involved in another PED scandal.

I have a dream that Ryan Braun morphs into a good guy.

I have a dream that all the Kardashian's including Bruce Jenner and Lamar Odom, make the
first civilian launch into outer space and never come back.

I have a dream that Lolo Jones gets an invitation to go with them.

I have a dream that we'll never have to see another ESPN The Magazine body issue.

I have a dream that Stephen A. Smith and Skip Bayless have a steel cage death match
against Mike Tyson on pay-per-view.

I have a dream that I'll come back in my next life as a major league baseball player and have
a beard as cool as the one Josh Reddick sports.

I have a dream the New York Jets fold the big tent and quit being a three-ring circus.

I have a dream the Pittsburgh Pirates beat the Oakland A's in seven games for the
World Series title.

I have a dream that Bobby Valentine finally gets the credit he deserves for inventing the
sandwich wrap.

I have a dream that Twitter blows itself up before more athletes do it to themselves.

I have a dream that Peter Gammons becomes the next commissioner of baseball and his
band plays before a sold out crowd at Fenway Park.

I have a dream the Chicago Bears will finally get a functional, at least circa 1995, offense.

I have a dream that hockey will become our national pastime.

I have a dream that Tim Tebow ends our misery of watching him try to be an NFL quarterback
and finds his true calling of ending world hunger, curing the sick, and bringing peace to

Now that Vince Young has a job, I have a dream he has the discipline not to buy everyone
at the Cheesecake Factory drinks and dinner.

I have a dream that all reality shows become extinct----tomorrow. Actually, I like "Extreme
Weight Loss". So, we can keep that one.

I have a dream somebody comes up with a fat-free, sugar-free donut.

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