Thursday, June 13, 2013

TOP 10 NAMES I'D SWIPE FOR A DAY (VOL.III)

10. JOEY PANKAKE. On Tuesday afternoon, I was working on my computer and had
 the UNC-South Carolina game on in the background. When I heard the ESPN announcer say,
 "Joey Pankake is waiting on deck",  I almost fell out of my chair. Joey Pankake? Yep, Pankake
 as in Aunt Jemima's favorite breakfast food. The South Carolina power-hitter's name stands
 right up there with Joey Baggadonuts, Joey Buttofucco, and Paulie Walnuts. Those names just
 roll off the tongue in a very unique way. I'd settle for Joey's last name, then I could be Paulie
 Pankake.

  9. TUUKA RASK. I don't think many people outside of Boston heard this name before the
  NHL playoffs started, but Tuuka Rask has become a household name. (Among NHL fans,
  anyway) Tooooooka! I'm sure many people will be naming their new puppies, "Tooooka".
  And the Bruins goalie not only has a great first name, but he has a spectacular mask, rhymes
  with Rask, which he has painted on the bottom of it.
 
 
 
8. JOHNNY ODUYA. The Blackhawks defenseman has a name right up there with Dirk
  Diggler. I'm just wondering when a porn-star producer is going to use this name in his next
  film or video. "Hi, I'm Johnny Oduya." Girl: "Excuse me, what did you same your name was?"
  "It's Oduya." I could've sworn NBC Sports play-by-play announcer was laughing every time
   he called Johnny Oduya's name out.
  

   7. YASIEL PUIG. It's pronounced Ya-SEE-el Pweeg. OK, so maybe the Dodgers rookie's
   name doesn't roll off the tongue like Joey Pankake, but it's definitely unique. If I can't have his
   name, I'd love to have is powerful right arm and picture-perfect swing. Pweeeeeeeeeg!
  

   6. MILAN LUCIC. Ok, so maybe I still have hockey on the brain from last night's three
   overtime thriller between Chicago and Boston. But, you have to admit, this series is not only
   filled with great talent, but great names as well. Milan Lucic is a classic. The Bruins rugged
   forward has a name that's pronounced Me-Lan LOO-Cheech. That's a great first name and
   last name.

   5. SKYE DAWSON. Any name that has Skye in it, especially for an athlete, is a good one.
   The former kick returner from TCU, which also makes him a former Horned Frog, another
   classic name, just signed a free-agent contract with the Washington Redskins.

   4. YOURHIGHNESS MORGAN.  I kid you not. This dude was a hard-hitting linebacker
    for Florida Atlantic University until a series of concussions forced him to call it a career
    last year. I sure hope he doesn't get brain damage that affects him memory. It'd be a shame
    if he couldn't remember his name.
   

   3. GRAHAM SAIKO. Does the South Carolina baseball team have a few great names or
    what? First, there's Johnny Pankake, and now, Graham Saiko (Psycho). When people say
    he's a psycho, they aren't kidding.
   

   2. SKYE BOLT. Simply an awesome name that you just can't forget. Skye Bolt. Wow. He
   plays outfield for the College World Series-bound UNC Tar Heels. No relation to Usain
   Bolt.
  
  
   1. DICK TRICKLE. In honor of the former NASCAR driver and short-track legend, I
   have to put Dick Trickle at the head of this list. Trickle, regarded as one of the nicest guys
   in the sport, died of a self-inflicted gunshot wound last month.
  
 

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