Thursday, May 9, 2013

MIAMI HEAT AND THE FINGER-WAVING BLONDE


The finger, the blonde, the pure venom. Ah, yes. If there was ever a picture that captured all three
so perfectly, it's this one. After Joakim Noah of the Chicago Bulls was ejected on Wednesday in
Miami, this bleached-blonde, foul-mouthed, finger-pointing Heat fan, became the subject of a
picture that is worth far more than 1,000 words.

She gave Noah an up close and personal view of her favorite bird. Yep, just flipped it so close
in front of Noah's face she could've collected sweat off it. I've seen and covered people who've
gotten arrested for doing less than that. There is just pure hate on her face as vile comes out of
her mouth. And this is a grown up at a basketball game? How embarrassing. You might expect
that from a liquored up frat boy whose daddy hooked him up with tickets at the last second, but
a woman that appears to be a few days from 50? Good, grief.


She is such a great role model. I'm sure she has a son or daughter out there somewhere who is
afraid to go class, work, or the gym because of what they are sure to face. "Hey, buddy, I saw
your mom on TV last night  and she's all over the papers this morning. Man, I've never seen
anybody  go postal on a player like that. She should get that finger registered as a lethal weapon."

Her day might be even worse, but one can never tell in this Twitter, Facebook, 15-minutes of
fame loving world. I'm sure she'll get an invite to be on the "Housewives of South Beach", asked
to do a photo shoot for 'Playboy', or get interviewed for "Entertainment Tonight". Heck, CNN
might go down there with Anderson Cooper and do wall-to-wall coverage of her. You just never
know.

She'll get plenty of stares and snickers as she gets her more latte at Starbucks before heading off
to yoga class. As she has lunch on Ocean drive, she'll get a few, "aren't you the one..." from the people serving her. Yep, for better or worse, this woman will have more attention than
she could've ever have dreamed up after flipping the finger seen around the world.

Let's examine this woman much like the 24/7 news obsessed world would.

Hometown. She's a transplant in Miami, not a tough call there, isn't everybody? Definitely a
a native New Yorker, most likely growing up somewhere on Long Island, spending a few
of her summers getting all liquored up in the Hamptons pretending to be richer and something
different than she really was.

Status. There's very little doubt that she's on Facebook so she can post all of her pictures at
the game, on the beach, and at all the big parties. Her relationship status probably says, "In a
relationship, but it's complicated". Anything involving this woman appears to be complicated.
She's a divorcee enjoying the scene with a real estate mogul. Notice the pink band around
the wrist of her and her date?


Yep, they were at an exclusive party before the game started. Mickey Arison, owner of the
Heat probably hosted it and team president Pat Riley was there as well. Madonna checked in
for a quick appearance and Sylvester Stallone  stopped by to sign a few autographs.

The Body. Even at 50 years old, this finger-waving woman has a bitchin' body. She works out
six days a week, but does more than just yoga. I'm thinking she has sampled P90x somewhere
along the line and works out with a personal training. She is ripped. The arms and legs are pumped
and cut. She might not have a full six-pack, but she's pretty darn close. She's had a little
nip-and-tuck and people think she's a lot younger than she really is.

Job. None. Are you kidding me? She's still getting big alimony while being the trophy girlfriend
of the real estate mogul. This woman has it good. Workout for 2 hours, get the mani-pedi, daily
massage and facials. A little botox before dinner in South Beach, then it's off to the big game for
the Bulls and Heat.

Yep, life was really good until she flipped the bird and walked into the spotlight. This is your
15-minutes of fame or infamy. Should be interesting to see what's uncovered.

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