Monday, November 28, 2011

URBAN MEYER: IT WASN'T ABOUT THE MONEY, SERIOUSLY

He has two national championships, Tim Tebow on speed-dial,
and one of the coolest names on earth. Now, Urban Meyer has
the keys to the Ohio State kingdom and a ridiculous six-year
contract that could be worth $40 million when it's all said and
done. But according to Meyer, who spent the past year as an
analyst for ESPN, it wasn't an easy decision for him to come
back to the game.


 After six years at Florida, Meyer was burnt out and in a "dark place",
thanks to health issues and the guilt associated with being an absentee
father. However, hitting the Ohio Powerball and the chance to coach
in his home state helped Meyer heal faster than a hopeless crowd
at a Joel Osteen Bible study.

At Monday's introductory press conference, here is what Meyer
said and what he was actually thinking.

MEYER SAID:
"If not for the coaching position at Ohio State, I would not have
coached this year,"

WHAT MEYER WAS THINKING:
"I would've coached at Ball State if it meant not going back
to Bristol next year and hearing Stuart Scott go, "Boo-Yeah!!"
all day.



WHAT MEYER SAID:
"A year ago in my mind I was convinced I was done coaching,"
"I've been checked out and I'm ready to go."

WHAT MEYER WAS THINKING:
"I don't care if I was in a strait-jacket and coaching like Pete
Carroll. If somebody offers you $40 million, you get healthy
or fake it and double up on the Prozac." 

At Florida in 2010, there were 31 arrests involving 25 of Meyer's
players dating to the summer of 2005, according to the Orlando Sentinel.
Meyer acknowledged these issues Monday but said the numbers
were exaggerated. (Of course, they were)

WHAT MEYER SAID:
"We did not have bad guys. Did they make stupid mistakes? Yes.
We're going to try to recruit really good people to represent
Ohio State."

WHAT MEYER WAS THINKING:
"Will we have some stupid players? Of course, we're dealing
with Ohio here. I just hope the ones that represent Ohio State
don't gamble like Art Schlichter, pack a pistol the way Maurice
Clarett did, crave tattoos like Terrell Pryor or be as brain dead
as Andy Katzenmoyer was.


WHAT MEYER SAID:
While at Florida "I tried to do other people's jobs, maybe to a fault,"
he conceded.  "Trying to cure NCAA issues, agent issues, drug issues."

WHAT MEYER WAS THINKING:
"Half of those kids at Florida couldn't spell their name and smoked
more dope than an NBA team. I had to coach, babysit, and keep
them eligible. If Jim Tressel spent half as much time keeping
his players off the police blotter as he did pressing his sweater-vest,
we wouldn't be here.

WHAT MEYER SAID:
"I don't want to be one of those coaches that sleeps in his
 office."

WHAT MEYER WAS THINKING:
"I don't want to be one of those coaches that sleeps in his
office----unless Erin Andrews is there." 



 

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