Thursday, November 3, 2011

JOSE CANSECO TO FIGHT LENNY DYKSTRA. I'M SERIOUS.

There are some things you just can't make up. Jose Canseco
fighting Lenny Dykstra in a boxing ring is one of them. This
is a bigger than Alabama-LSU! Are you kidding me? Two of
the biggest juice heads, screwballs, eff ups, and players that
blew millions and scorched their reputations will square off
on Saturday night in Hollywood and you can see it for just
$19.95 on pay-per-view. It's obvious that both need the
money.


Canseco, who outed nearly everyone in baseball that was
using steroids, has been a pariah in the sport. He says he
was blackballed.....oh, when you act like Canseco did during
and after his career, people would much rather  try
to fix an overheated nuclear reactor than be friends with
you. Canseco tries to talk to people and all he hears is
crickets, nothing but crickets.

Dykstra's fall from grace was much swifter than Canseco's.
He duped everybody on Wall Street and the media after
his playing days were over. "Nails" as he was called during
his career, became a financial wizard giving advice while
earning millions. He was featured on "60 Minutes", and
Jim Cramer of "Mad Money" said Dykstra was the real
deal. But that real deal folded quicker than Bear Stearns
and a house of cards. Turns out, Dykstra was a fraud.
He ran from bills, owed people millions, was accused of
sexual harrassment, and ultimately got thrown in prison.
"Nails" is flat broke and expected to serve a lot of time
in the big house.


However, on Saturday night, Dykstra vows "to destroy"
Canseco, which has been done often to Rico Sauve in
his illustrious boxing and martial arts career. He's lost
to Vai Sikehema, Danny Bonaducci, some 7-foot Chinese
guy, and I think Tonya Harding. Now, he'll get into the
ring with Dykstra, who is 5'10 and about 230lbs now,
I don't think he's been doing P90x religiously. Canseco
has the height advantage at 6'3" and appears to be still
be juicing. But Dykstra is a tough, little dude and has
more than a few screws loose.


                                  TALE OF THE TAPE

                       CANSECO                      DYKSTRA

                        6'3"               HT              5'10"
                        240               WT              230
                       YES             JUICED        YES
                   CHEMIST   NICKNAME    NAILS
                    45.6 Million    EARNED       36.5 Million
                    45.6 Million      LOST          36.5 Million
                        0               FRIENDS           0
                        1               ARRESTS          2
                    BLEAK          FUTURE      BLEAKER

Canseco is O-for-the world in his boxing career. I don't think
"Nails" has ever lost a fight outside the courtroom in his life. After
speaking with boxing expert Bert Sugar, I am picking Dykstra over
Canseco. "Nails" is a ball of fury and he has a lot of pent up rage and
anger from wearing an orange jumpsuit. This won't go the distance,
with Dykstra scoring the knockout. Forget about LSU-Alabama,
my eyeballs will be on the real fight of the century,Canseco vs. Dykstra.

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