5. CARLOS ZAMBRANO Chicago Cubs. The organization made
Zambrano go to anger management after his epic meltdown last year.
Or I should say epic meltdowns cause the man they call "Volcano"
erupted on more than one occasion. After getting ejected by the
umpire while disputing a close call at home plate, Zambrano hurled a
ball into the left-field bleachers, which was by far, his best throw
of the season. Then after giving up five runs in the first inning of a
game, Zambrano went ballistic yelling at teammates and nearly
getting in a fight with Derek Lee and manager Lou Pinella. Zambrano,
who will make $18 million dollars this season, actually calmed down
after a few sessions with Dr. Phil. But as they say, once a volcano,
always a volcano, and the "Big Z" could go postal in 2011.
4. BO PELLINI. Nebraska head football coach. Have you ever seen this
guy on the sideline during a game? He looks like somebody shoved
a red-hot poker where the sun doesn't shine. The guy is a five-alarm
fire with smoke coming out of his ears and projectiles launching from
his mouth. The university and Big 12 have already reprimanded Pellini
for his antics. The Big 10 gets Pellini next year and that conference hasn't
seen a lunatic like this since Woody Hayes of Ohio State punched out
Charley Bauman of Clemson that ended his career.
3. MILTON BRADLEY. Seattle Mariners OF. After putting Bradley on this list,
I hit the Staples button because that was easy. Total wackadoodle. Nut job.
He makes Carl Everett look like Mr Rogers in the neighborhood. Should
we run down the list? Throws a ball at a fan as a Dodger. Tries to pile drive
an umpire as a Padre. As a Ranger, he runs up to the Royals broadcast
booth after hearing the announcers criticize him. He gets run out of Chicago
and arrested in Seattle. Tick..Tick...Tick. Run for cover, this guy is another
walking time bomb.
2. RON ARTEST. Los Angeles Lakers. Artest hasn't played well this year
and has been relatively quiet, but who can forget his bizarre press conference
after winning last year's NBA finals? Whoa! Talking about his relationship
with his shrink and then celebrating while still in his uniform at a bar in L.A.
Great stuff. But he's still combustible and capable of another breakdown.
I mean, how can we leave a guy off the list who ignited the biggest brawl
in NBA history when he played for the Indiana Pacers? He's close to
Charlie Sheen in Los Angeles so I'm sure he was taking good notes of
Sheen's recent performance.
1. MIKE TYSON. You didn't forget about "Iron Mike" did you? He was
featured on HBO's "Real Sports" last week and has his own show on
Animal Planet. He and the pigeons, what's up with pigeons? The former
self-proclaimed, "baddest man on the planet" is going to be in "Hangover 2"
to make another cameo. You had to love his performance in the first movie.
The more you see Tyson, the more you hear about him getting into
trouble later. I think he's still suffering from the curse that Robin Givens
put on him. He met and married the gold-digger and then went crazy,
losing his title, millions, his freedom, and what sanity he had left. Tyson
seems more at peace with himself now, after going from champ to clown.
But for a guy who was arrested more than 30 times before he was 13,
trouble never seems to be far away. I can see him telling Jim Gray during
an exclusive interview, that he "wants to eat his children", and then
eating both of his ears. I just can't see the Tyson story with anything
but a tragic ending.